A Little Scared

Charlotte has had a developmental explosion this week. She has gone from acting like I’ve put her on hot coals every time I suggest tummy time to willingly rolling to her tummy to…gasp…play with toys.

 She’s also figured out she can get places by rolling. She’s pushing up, reaching for things, and bringing anything that touches her fingers to her mouth.

She’s also been full of DRAAAAAMMMMMA and lots and lots of tears. She screams, she cries, and she kicks her little legs in protest. Her sleeping has been horrible the last week (at least 4-5 wakings at night, and if I’m lucky, 45 minute naps during the day). I texted a few friends yesterday morning asking if it was bedtime yet. Um, it was 7:30 am.

Sweet Grayson is usually just oblivious to his sister’s screams

 I was talking to my mom on the phone yesterday (she’s been out of town for a week) and telling her all this and she suggested that Charlotte may be overwhelmed with herself regarding all her new skills. That while learning new things is wonderful and exciting, it can also be a little scary.

Yeah, I can relate. Typical development is tripping.me.out.

I’ve been a mom for almost 3 years, but everything Charlotte learns and does is basically brand new to me. Having a baby that meets milestones and learns new things every day is completely foreign to everything I’ve experienced so far. And I’m a little scared.

I don’t know what to do with a baby that’s mobile. I have a hard enough time getting things done with my babies who right now basically stay in the same spot where I put them. I’ve never had to baby proof a thing- what if I overlook something and she gets hurt?

Oh and the FOOD thing. Terrified. After Grayson’s eating issues, I think I have PTSD when it comes to feeding babies. Charlotte will be 5 months old tomorrow- I am planning on introducing solids at 6 months. That gives me ONE MONTH left of “easy” feeding. I have a hard enough time getting the 3 of us dressed and out the door in the morning; now I’m going to have to fit in baby breakfast too (well and eventually lunch and dinner) and I have no clue how this is going to work.

I know a lot of you are probably rolling your eyes because you do this already, and it just is what it is. You chase your babies and toddlers all day. You offer them food, and they either eat it, refuse it, or throw it on the floor. You’ve baby proofed, but you don’t live in a bubble, and somehow your kids are still alive. I get it.

Yes, Grayson is incredibly difficult to care for in a lot of ways. But he and his needs are all I’ve known. And now I’m having to learn a completely different little person with different needs, and while it’s thrilling and exciting, it’s overwhelming. So I’m going to try and give this precious little person a break when she loses it again today. Maybe I’ll just cry a little along with her. And then we’ll pick ourselves up and keep learning new things. And we’ll be ok.

By the way, is “Chewing on Brother’s Foot” an expected milestone? (I die laughing looking at Grayson’s expression in this video)


10 thoughts on “A Little Scared

  1. Find the Wonder Weeks chart online. I'm wondering if Charlotte is going through one of those right now? Could teething at night be an issue? So sorry things are tough, hope she calms down and you guys can get some sleep and rest soon!

  2. Graham did the same thing with the sleeping and naps at about 5 months old too. It gets better…hang in there! I also use the wonder weeks app, and it is very accurate and helpful!

  3. We waited until 6 months to try solids, too, and when we did start, we started with mid-morning meal (around 10:00-10:30), rather than breakfast (she spent afternoons at daycare, and we'd usually leave just after she woke up from her second morning nap, so lunch wasn't an option). It helped A LOT to not be trying to master this new skill early in the morning when (a) I'm tired and crabby and (b) she's really hungry.Good luck!

  4. she's a mover. When I was looking after her the other day I put her down and then went to get something in the kitchen for literary 15 seconds and when I got back she was 5 feet from the spot where I put her down. I honestly have no clue how she moved that far!

  5. Yeah, developmental bursts often cause fussiness and disrupted sleep patterns, Things will settle soon. And if you can juggle meds and feeds and all of the other things we have to deal with, I have no doubt you'll be great at all this "normal" stuff soon, too!

  6. I can't stop laughing. Oh sweet dramatic baby C, those crying pictures are too funny and good to pull out when dramatic later on. You will for sure do great with all these new milestones, and I'll be honest, Sophia just had to eat when I could fit it in, because as you said, most mornings we were trying to get out the door. Horray for new challanges and they will seem less big once you get a little more sleep? And it's true, sleep suffers as they learn new skills, it's like their brains can't slow down enough to snooze. Just wait till she gets stuck standing in the crib and does not sleep because can't sit back down….but I jump ahead! Xoxo-

  7. Not silly at all that you're feeling overwhelmed right now! 2 kids is HARD, especially when your experience parenting them will be so different. As far as feeding time goes, it took us a few months to really get up to 3 meals a day. We started with dinner I think (just giving her a few bites of whatever we were having) and then I did some breakfasts (she could sit in her chair and gum on slices of avocado, eggs, bananas, etc. while I made my own breakfast and packed her lunch for daycare). That's a huge benefit of Baby Led Weaning – they feed themselves, so you're not stuck sitting there spoon feeding instead of multi-tasking. 🙂

  8. I will admit, I did smile and shake my head a little at this post. Not because I thought it was silly you were worrying about things that I've already had to deal with but I think it's silly that you are worrying about these things after all you've already been through. I can guarantee you that nothing that girl has to throw at you will be as hard as what you've already done. You girls will figure it out as you go along, just like all of us did.The thing is, you won't know what you need to do until you have to do it. I never had to baby proof because my daughter just didn't get into things the way other kids sometimes do. We barely put covers over the electrical outlets and we never put foam on the table corners or latched the cabinets because she never opens cabinets or drawers and doesn't get into things or climb on them. I was realizing that with a boy, we might have to do those things, but honestly, they weren't a concern before.This is just so to say, you will figure out what you need to do because she will show you. And in the meantime there is no reason to be too stressed out. You can handle WAY MORE than most people ever have to. You can handle this.

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